Have you ever experienced the power of affirmations? I’m Tessie, a Certified Eating Psychology coach, and I help all my clients create affirmations to help them cope with negative body image.
(I wrote about how affirmations work in another column here at Residence 11. It’s a great resource to read with this article!)
Even though I spent most of my life as an athlete, and a good chunk of time as a model, actor, and dancer who would be judged “fit,” I struggled with body image issues. My cycle of extremely restrictive diets flung me into depression, weight gain, and, after hitting somewhat of a rock bottom after winning a bodybuilding competition… an inner knowing that there is more to health than what we look like.
As my journey continued, I discovered how affirmations could help me create positive change in my life. Through the process of writing and speaking affirmations, I learned how to redirect my behavior and improve my outlook on my body and my relationships.
Here are some tips to help you create your own affirmations. It’s all about taking you into the “way of being” you so desire to emulate effortlessly. Sometimes, however, this can feel like a conscious reminder that we don’t authentically “feel beautiful”, for example, when saying an affirmation like “I am beautiful”.
But don’t let that feeling or hesitation discourage you from committing to an affirmation practice. In fact, consider it normal to experience the discomfort of saying a statement you don’t yet believe wholeheartedly. It’s part of the process to breakthrough and actually feel beautiful over time! Be gentle and honor yourself as you create your affirmations.
Write down all the qualities that you want!
Brainstorm ‘I am’ statements about the type of person you are and who you want to become. For example, I am lovable. I am beautiful. I am nourishing myself. Think of qualities and outcomes that you truly desire.
Writing down is going to feel a little uncomfortable, because you are writing things down in the present as if they are already true, you might not believe it yet. That’s okay. Just write it down. Focus on feelings and personality qualities vs. appearance-based outcomes.
For example: “I am strong” is more empowering and encouraging than “I am a size 2”. There’s nothing wrong with being a size 2 if that’s where your body ends up… but the point is being clear on how you want to feel, no matter what your body does or doesn’t look like.
Balance negatives with positives.
Next you’ll want to brainstorm all the icky self-talk that comes up for you most often. What are those phrases or punishing statements your inner critic stabs you with on a regular basis? Maybe it’s “I’m not good enough”, “I am a failure.” “I will never change” “I am never going to stop yo yo dieting” “I am fat” “ I am ugly”. Write them all down.
Next, make sure all the negative things you wrote down have a positive opposite to them. If you write, ‘I am ugly,’ then you’ll want to create an exact opposite and be sure to include that in your positive list.
Say it out loud!
By saying the positive affirmations out loud, you are helping to manifest the result. In doing so, we are creating different connections in our brain to combat negative thought patterns. It might not feel like much in the moment, but that’s why it’s important to have a consistent practice. Over time this process will contribute to a more positive environment where you’re going to wake up and be like, “oh, I do love my body.” There is a power behind it.
Use Digital Tools.
There are YouTube videos, apps and other resources that have a recording with gentle music or binaural beats and either audible or subliminal messages that are not consciously recognized by our hearing, but our brain will take them on when we’re listening to the recording.
Practice Affirmations Early or Late.
The best time to do affirmations is usually first thing in the morning or last thing at night. Our deepest thoughts and emotions (and our ego) make up our inner voice and these elements live on a subconscious level. We’re not really trying to think these negative thoughts, they are just happening because of our patterns. The wall to this harmful voice is usually down in the morning and last thing at night. It’s a really good time to be in control of what we’re thinking!
Keep a written journal.
Spend five minutes a day writing affirmations in a journal. As I always say, a GAPL a day keeps the sadness away.
Grateful – write down one thing you’re grateful for in the moment.
Affirmation – write down one “I am” statement.
Proud – Write down one thing you are proud you did today.
Let Go – Release one thing that didn’t go as planned.
Schedule affirmations.
If it’s something you are not doing already, then set an alarm on your phone or put the sticky note up on the mirror that has your affirmation to remind yourself to do it every morning and/or night.
I hope these tips are helpful! I’d love to hear what affirmation is powerful for you in this moment. You can practice right now and comment with your “I am” statement below!