As ethical nonmonogamy becomes a more common relationship choice, it’s good to remember that it is a personal choice–and you can change your mind at any time.
On Reddit, one reader shared an extremely personal story about their journey through non-monogamous relationships. Ultimately, they decided to take a break and return to monogamy.
What does that story matter? The Reddit reader explained:
“I just wanted to make this post to share my experience, and perhaps to remind those in a similar spot that it’s okay if this isn’t for you, even if you’ve put a lot of energy into it. The most important thing is to remain true to yourself. Who knows, maybe I’ll be back, maybe not, but I think I need to spend some time getting to know me again.”
When you are trying ethical nonmonogamy in a relationship, it can be a challenge. It can be especially tough when you know your partner is with someone else and it’s your first time experiencing that. As usual, communication plays a vital role in a healthy relationship.
A number of readers agreed. One reader stressed that ethical non-monogamy will never be a one-size-fits-all solution. Check it out:
“I don’t think non-monogamy is better than monogamy. It’s just a different way that works better for some, but both are equally valid. It’s about finding out what works for you – and then finding compatible partner(s).”
One reader had this advice for when to call it quits:
“Some people have a lot of energy for other people, but I felt I was spreading myself too thin.”
“when I’m less stressed and have more energy nonmono is fun and great. When I’m under the gun of deadlines, super stressed, and generally burnt out, nonmonogamy drains me. So I hit pause and enjoy what I can when I can.”